Fear.

Something I've wanted for so long. Get a job and earn my own money.
And now I got it, now it's becoming real, I'm scared.

Tomorrow I have my first day at my new, first ever real job and I'm so scared. I don't know what to expect. I don't know what will be expected of me. I don't know if the people there will like me. I don't know if I will like the people there. I hate this fear, I try everything to get rid of it. But it doesn't seem to be working and it's making me crazy. Tomorrow, at 10:45 I'm going to have to leave my house to go to this job and I don't know how I will ever be able to do that. I'm afraid everything will go wrong and it will be the worst day of my life.
Even though I know I will be alright. I will maybe even like it, have a really good first day of my future.

This is what my head always does to me. It makes me crazy. To the point that I don't want to do anything anymore. I just want to stay in my bed, eating, watching Gossip Girl. Peacefully and safe. But I can't. I have to face these kind of things, no matter how scary they are.
And when I do, at the end of the day, I'm happy I did.

I'll keep you updated.

Have a nice life
Xoxo
Winnie.